It was a discussion we were having on our Uber ride to a Baptist World Aid Board meeting. We agreed that we were all familiar with the steps that go into making good decisions. There are many valuable models but here is a common 7 step approach:
1 Clarify the decision to be made (So simple to say – sometimes complex in practice)
2 Gather relevant data to guide your decision (Tap into more than one source)
3 Identify alternatives (And there are almost always some, so beware of those who insist there aren’t)
4 Weigh evidence (An important stage. Avoid echo chambers. Genuinely consider opposing views.)
5 Make the decision (While a delay to get more evidence can be ok, face decision phobia if it strikes)
6 Implement the decision (Part of the decision should be: who implements it; when; and with what?)
7 Review results (Because this is the path to yet better decision making)
All this is simple enough and you’ll find it, or something very similar, in multiple texts on decision making. But what about those times when something more intuitive is required – those times when you sense you need to go against the stream, or to challenge conventional wisdom? Facts are indeed friends, but they don’t tell you everything. And more fundamentally, for those who tread a path of faith, how do we leave space to hear the voice of God, or, as we were discussing on our Uber ride, how do we differentiate between a good idea and a God idea? Put differently, when is discernment not the same as standard decision making?
First a qualifier. Let’s not work with false alternatives. A good decision making process is usually part of a good discernment process. We are not talking about polar opposites. But notice I said a good decision making process is usually a part of a good discernment process. Discernment is usually a longer term process and is grounded in thinking through some deeper questions. Once answered, they provide a backdrop for future decisions.
If it is discernment at a personal level it requires you to ask questions like: “Who am I called or invited to be?”, “What matters to me and what drives me?” “What are my values?”, “What legacy do I hope to leave?” “What is God’s perspective on this and how does it work out in my situation?” You are unlikely to be able to answer these questions quickly, but you will gain clarity over time, and once you get a deeper sense of who you are, some options simply fall away – because why explore them if they draw you away from who you most truly are called to be? I have met many people who after travelling a path for a while have stopped and changed, saying simply, “I realised, that’s just not who I am,” or “I wasn’t comfortable with the person I was becoming – I knew I needed to change.” When they say that, they have made more than a decision. They have discerned something deep and important about their own being.
Of course sometimes people say that in error – thinking that because they attempted something that was out of step with their chapter in life, it should never be. Sometimes things don’t work because of timing or a cluster of other circumstances – so ask “is this who I should never be or was this simply the wrong time or with the wrong people?”
In discernment we sift and sort what sits best with what matters most to us. It takes time and there isn’t a set end point – but our insights slowly deepen and we make progress. It usually works best if we invite others into the process and listen to their feedback, but remember, ultimately you have to discern which of the feedback was well intentioned but not necessarily right, and which was perhaps a gentle whisper from God. For God sometimes speaks to us through others, but if you haven’t already noticed – sometimes falls short of every time!
What about group or organisational discernment?
Again, discernment is the longer process of clarifying vision and mission and values and priorities. Without these, decision making takes place in a vacuum. You may conclude, “as a stand alone decision, that makes sense, but I have no idea where this leads to or why?” Without a meaningful framework, the quick buck and the ethical compromise might seem right, but in the longer term they lead to organisations without a heart – a cold culture that saps the life of those who devote their working years to it. It doesn’t need to be so. Most organisations exist for a valid purpose – it’s just that somewhere along the way they forget what it is. They need to discern their “why” again. It can be as ordinary as “selling people cars they will enjoy driving”, or “providing sound financial advice that helps take the stress out of aging”. That’s very different to “selling you any car you are silly enough to buy” or “pressurising you to buy products that get me the highest commission”.
Of course there is nothing new in forgetting or ignoring our “why” – or as Ecclesiastes 1:9 puts it, “Nothing under the sun is truly new.” Jesus clashed with the religious leaders of his day over and over. In Matt 23 he calls them hypocrites no fewer than 6 times (v13, 15, 23, 25, 27, 29). What went wrong for those leaders? I wrote more about this in another post, but let’s remember, it was a tough route to become a Scribe or Pharisee. It wasn’t for the faint hearted. Yet somewhere in the busy journey of moralising on how other people should live, and paying excessively close attention to what is right and what is wrong, they lost their way. I suspect they were good at decision making (and they were pretty decisive that Jesus was not the Messiah – couldn’t be. Didn’t meet the criteria they had decided upon) – but were completely out of their depth when in came to discernment. They forgot their wider purpose, and missed the day when God was on their doorstep.
What’s the “why” behind this post? I guess it’s just a little query. Have you taken the time to discern the really big lines of your life? Until you have, even the best decision making framework might lead no where. For deciding and discerning are not always the same…
Nice chatting…
Photo by Ann H: https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-blue-yes-button-and-a-red-no-button-21562934/
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