Colliding truths are always fascinating. Try this one. We are not supposed to judge others, but exercising good judgment is a crucial part of living a good life. Should we be moral watchdogs, evaluating the behaviour and lifestyles of others, or should we simply adopt a live and let live attitude, generously passing off differences with “it takes all sorts to make a world” or “if it works for you, it works for you – so that’s fine”?
Those in favour of disinterest in the behaviour of others might quickly quote the words of Jesus from Matt 7:1-2 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Take that literally, and if your neighbour starts yet another adulterous affair, or drives drunkenly through the suburb, or screams endless abuse at their spouse and children, like the three wise monkeys you will block eyes, ears and mouth, and see, hear and speak no evil. But is that really ok? When is silence irresponsible? When does silence facilitate abuse? Aren’t we supposed to judge some things?
Of course while Jesus tells us not to judge others in Matt 7, in John 7:24 he softens that with his instruction to “Stop judging by mere appearances, and make a right judgement.” Is there a difference between judging and judgment? Yes there is. Let’s think about it.
Judging others means – well judging others! It presupposes that we are in a position to do this, and presumably then can see all their motives, understand everything about them and interpret their position accurately. The trouble is that only God has access to the full range of information – and you and I are assuredly not God. When we judge we operate with far too many assumptions, a fair number of which will almost always be wrong.
Have you ever been in the situation where you have felt critical of someone, and essentially written them off? I have. And then I have discovered something that has changed that perception, and has made me see them in a new light. Some have become good friends. There is an old saying that to know all is to forgive all. While I am not sure it is always true, (sometimes the more you know the less acceptable something becomes. Some information makes you say “Well that’s even worse then!”), it often is. And even when it isn’t, the thrust of Jesus’ command In Matt 7 is that we all need forgiveness. When we are outraged by another, are we forgetting the shadow inside of us? That shadow should make us pause before we rush towards a verdict. We might like to think of ourselves when we are at our best, but others might have experienced us when we were at our worst. Their assessment might be very different!
Instead of judging others, Jesus urges “right judgment”. What’s that? Well, it’s right judgment. It is not about the moral worth of another, but an assessment of the likely outcome of certain actions. Our judgment might well be that if someone travels a particular path no good will come from it. That’s simply being wise. And part of being wise is also to decide if it’s appropriate to share your judgment with the other. I have had people say to me “I’m a little worried about you. I think if you continue doing (whatever), you will (burn yourself out/ become jaded/ offend people unnecessarily etc).” It’s a judgment they have made and most often I have valued it – largely because I don’t feel judged but cared for. Someone else’s “right judgment” of your position could be extremely helpful for you.
Jesus also stresses that a prerequisite of right judgment is not being convinced by “mere appearances”. The wider context of John 7:24 was a dispute over Sabbath laws, which Jesus was accused of violating. On the basis of “mere appearances” the accusation was valid, but dig a little deeper, and you realise that he was upholding the deepest intent of the Sabbath laws.
Right judgment is willing to ask the “what is it that really matters here” question. That’s often not easy to answer, but it begins with curiosity. Behind every law and instruction in the Bible is a “why” – and it’s important to ask the why question. Naturally we should ask as humble inquirers – we may think we know why and be completely wrong, but that doesn’t mean our curiosity is misguided.
Right judgement often leads to great compassion. Instead of a hasty “what a disgusting person” we may see something far deeper – a quiet despair born from too many disappointments, or never having a better way modelled, or having no windows on life and the world. Instead of failure we might see unreached potential. Right judgment might even leave us with a responsibility. We might hear the Spirit prompt us help them reach that God given potential – to paint a picture not of judgment but of possibility.
There is another dimension which we find in John 16:8, where Jesus informs us that it is the role of the Spirit to convict of sin. That is liberating! You and I are not the Spirit. I have sometimes heard Christians come across as shrill, judgmental judges. Ask them why, and they will say something like, “The stakes are high. If they don’t repent of their sins they will not be forgiven. And you know as well as I do that what they are doing is wrong, so of course I’m judging them.” Jesus suggested another way. In John 13:34-35 Jesus unpacks his new commandment – an instruction to love each other in such a way that a watching world knows that we are most truly followers of Jesus the Christ. And my experience has been that when people see that, the Spirit does what only the Spirit can do, and creates a deep hunger for God, and conviction of sin, and a desire for forgiveness and new life. Our role is to love in a radically new way. We can trust the Spirit to do any convicting that is needed. Actually, I have often started out wondering why the Spirit wasn’t convicting someone else about what clearly seemed to me to be wrong, and then found that the Spirit was convicting me of my sin – my pride and lack of a deeper and more perceptive love.
As you enter another week, judge not… but use right judgement. And right judgement sees beyond mere appearances, asks curious questions, is shaped by love, and remembers its own shadow. It is grateful that God is God, and watches as the Spirit works in the world…
Nice chatting…
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